Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Screw you, Zuckerberg!

Facebook.  I loathe it to my soul, but I can't seem to leave it.  Every day I find a new reason but just can't seem to do it.  Even now, I'm thinking it will be better if I delete my page and just start new with another, being choosier about who I friend, ignoring the games, etc... but we all know how that's going to go.  It shouldn't be this damn hard.

But, it is, and now I realize why.

Back when everyone I knew was jumping on the Facebook train, I was content to just wave at them as they bulleted off into social media hell.  But, then I started getting news about friends, and even family, days sometimes weeks later and only when it was volunteered during real life social situations.  This conversation became all too common:

"What do you mean you don't know about that?  Everyone knows about it!"
"Well, it's not like anyone bothered to call or email me about it.""It was posted on Facebook."

And, no matter how many times I thumped the table with my fist and shouted, "I'm not on fucking Facebook, and I don't want to be!" it never seemed to sink in.  (A lot like after I voluntarily got rid of cable TV.  After being asked the thousandth time "have you seen...?" I nearly replaced "What part of 'I don't have fucking cable' do you not understand?" with a punch in the crotch.)
The final straw was when a rather important piece of news that I really needed to know didn't filter to me until it was too late because It Was Posted On Facebook.

That's when I knew I was beat.  There was no way these fuckers were going to keep me in the loop through normal human communication; it had to be on Facebook.
My very first status very nearly was "I hate all of you fuckers!" but I hadn't figured out the filtering and there were kids...

So, remembering that, I now realize why it's hard to leave: because I know I'll know nothing about anyone or anything important.  It's one thing to not give a shit about what someone had for dinner, but even vitally important matters are posted on Facebook first it seems.  It's like people have completely forgotten how to communicate outside social media, and the idea of someone not using it is now such a foreign concept they can't wrap their heads around it.  This disturbs me, but it also traps me because, even though they have leveled to stupid with how they communicate, there are people with whom I still want and need to keep in touch.  It is the perfect formula for holding people hostage while making them think they are in charge.

They really should just remove the call option from telephones.  It's not like it's being used anyway.

Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty addicted to texting, but it can never truly replace hearing a loved one's voice.  And, if you think that is wrong, then you should be boiled in your own juices to prevent further propagation of idiots of your kind.  

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